Love Hate Relationships and Abusive Relationships

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Love Hate Relationships and Abusive Relationships

Knowing More About Love Hate Relationships
and Abusive Relationships

abusive relationshipsLove hate relationships are, and can be, different things depending on whether or not one is referring to a physical relationship, or perhaps abusive relationships.

Looking at the terminology “love hate relationships” from a psychological point of view, one could compare the lifestyles of celebrities who get divorced and re-marry, (one example could be the now deceased Richard Burton and Elizabeth Taylor).

Love hate relationships can develop between friends, colleagues and even political opposites, but so can abusive relationships.

For those of you who want to know how the phrase “love hate relationship” originated, we can tell you that it was from Catullus, who was a Latin poet from the Roman republic.
Let’s get back on track… in this article we are only talking about love hate relationships and abusive relationships.

In the same spirit of things, abusive relationships can also be many things.

For example, abusive relationships can be, but not limited to, one or more of the following:

• Exerting power and control over a partner, who in reality is a victim
• Domestic Violence
• Physical Abuse
• Mental and Psychological Abuse
• Dating Abuse
• Economic Abuse
• Relational Aggression
• Emotional Blackmail

Exerting Power and Control

In an abusive relationship of this kind an abuser gains and controls a partner by applying several forms of abuse that could be described as acts of sexual and, or physical terror, and others named in this article.

Domestic Violence

This is just an outline of what domestic violence is, because relationship problems of this sort is a massive topic on its own and it is outside the scope of this article.

But within an intimate relationship of this nature, this can be spousal abuse, physical violence, also known as battering, violence against one’s own family and intimate violence against one’s partner, also referred to as IPV, [intimate partner violence].

Physical Abuse

Generally described as an intentional act meant to cause physical injury and, or trauma to a person, (adult or child). It is intended to injure, cause pain to someone and intimidate that person into mental and physical submission.

Mental and Psychological Abuse

Mental and psychological abuse is, as with any kind of abuse, a pure act of terror that o one has the right to exert upon anyone else. yet – it happens far too often, and it often goes undetected before it is too late.

Relationship issues involving psychological manipulation is again such a broad and large topic, we cannot possibly cover it all here.

But it should be suffice to say that it is where one partner forces some kind of intimidating behavior on another person so that the goal of achieving a sense of superiority or dominance is achieved, at the expense of the said victim.

Dating Abuse

Also referred to as dating violence, dating abuse is the threat, or perpetration, of a violent act by one person on another, (who are not married).

Some types of dating abuse can be:

• sexual harassment
• threatening behavior
• psychological manipulation
• sexual abuse
• emotional blackmail
• stalking

Economic Abuse

Economic abuse is also known as financial abuse and this often occurs in abusive relationships were two people live together and one exerts a self-acclaimed authority upon the other.

This act of abuse is generally unauthorized, thereby making it illegal, because one partner fraudulently uses and takes charge of a partner’s assets and money for his, or her, own gain.

Relational Aggression

Used by various age groups and by people of different standing relational aggression is where a person is subjected to having their social status damaged.

There are also various types of this kind of abuse which in basic terms is thought of as bullying – but it can be devastating for the one on the receiving end.

Emotional Blackmail

In short, emotional blackmail is where those close to us, directly or indirectly, make threats or insinuations where we will be punished, in one way or another, if we do not carry out their wishes or do things the way they decide.

Being attracted to someone from the opposite sex is a part of growing up. It’s just a natural part of life so don’t be shy and always hold your head high.

However, if you do want to get the attention of that person that makes your heart skip a beat or two then you should start doing or at least plan to do something to get yourself noticed.

Of course, this can be relatively easy if the other person has the same feelings as you do. The hurdle here is how you will determine if that is indeed the case or not.
The best course of action in this situation is to get to know your prospect partner more on a personal level if possible. It is important to increase the frequency of your contact with each other so you will at least be able to get an idea of whether he or she is also interested in you, or not.

This stage of knowing more about each other is also essential because you will be able to confirm if you really like your prospect after all the things you learn about him or her, whether positive or negative.

Just follow these tips and advice and you will be able to avoid getting stuck in love hate relationships that are most of the time caused by a hurried friendship to courting encounter.
But what if you are already trapped in one of the many love hate relationships that we have just mentioned here?

Basically, you will have to deal with it if you have real feelings for your partner and you want to confirm that your feelings are reciprocated.

If you have ended in this kind of situation, then a good move is to “start over” by courting and dating your partner, be helpful around the house, pay her compliments, wine and dine her. Do whatever it takes to woo her and re-win her heart but be genuine about it.

There are various types of relationships and for each and every one there are so called relationship rules which, although they are not set in stone, do need to be adhered to.

If on the other hand, you realize that you don’t feel passionate enough for your partner that warrants trying to save the relationship, then stop prolonging the agony and just break up with him or her – if this is to difficult, because you lack the courage to do so, then as a last resort you could take what some would call “the coward’s way out” and do something to get yourself kicked into touch!

This way, you won’t get to hurt each other anymore and at the same time you’ll be free to look for someone new.
Of course, this is easier said than done if you are in an abusive relationship, because one can feel trapped and alone, with no one to help.

However, love hate relationships are not all bad. A couple may have gotten off to a bad start but it doesn’t mean that love doesn’t exist between them.

The only problem with this kind of relationship is that you tend to fight and make up quite often. Hence, the name love hate relations. This is partly due to the fact that the pair didn’t take enough time in getting to know each other enough before engaging in a serious relationship.

The end result is that they only discover things about each other that surprise them now that they are lovers.

This will most likely transpire into quarrels. After which, they realize that they love each other and they make up and continue this annoying cycle.

In reality, a bit of a fight or misunderstanding here and there is healthy for any kind of relationship. Some people claim the more that you quarrel with your partner, the more it shows that both of you are interested in each other.

This is because it obviously shows that you are concerned with the well being of one another.

Nevertheless, it is important to keep fights in check. They saying goes: “The best part of breaking up, is making up” – which is true – but like everything else, repetition can become a bore.

If you are in o

ne of the many love hate relationships that go on, take good of yourself and each other!

There is a very fine line between the so called love hate relationships and abusive relationships, so do stay alert and stay safe always.


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